10 surprising things about being engaged (that no one prepared me for!)

Take it from someone who knows.

Words: Natasha Pavez

You’d think that, as someone who writes for bridal magazines, being engaged would come with zero surprises — aside from him popping the question, of course! Even six months after we first let everyone know we were tying the knot, here are my 10 surprising things about being engaged (that no one prepared me for!) … 

#1. You are going to get asked so many questions, over and over again

“How’d he do it?” “When’s the big day?” “Did you have any idea he was going to propose?” “Who picked the ring?” At first, it’s enough to make your head spin. Was there a small part of me wishing we’d filmed the proposal so I could pop it up on Insta to save time? Sure. But it’s also lovely to know that everyone is so excited and wants to share in the joy!

#2. The relationship changes

It has to, doesn’t it? He’s just told you he wants forever! Even knowing it was coming, it still changes things just a little bit. Relish that change because… 

#3. … life continues on

Except for that shiny, distracting rock on your finger, of course. At the end of the day, he’s still the guy you’re living with, he’s still going to do those little things you love (and sometimes loathe), and you still have to do the dishes. While admiring how your ring looks when the light hits it.

#4. You are never going to get used to saying fiancé

Partner is fine, and it’ll keep being fine until he’s my husband. If you think you’re the only one who feels this way, you’re not. Most of my married friends skipped straight from boyfriend/partner to husband. 

#5. You are going to rediscover Pinterest with a passion

And your Pinterest feed will have you down rabbit holes so fast you’ll think you’re Alice in Bridal Wonderland. Step away from Pinterest. It’s best in small doses.

#6. Suddenly, money becomes very, very, very important

Weddings are not cheap, especially if you’re going for every detail on your Pinterest board. Yes, you can learn how to cut costs or do some things thriftily — and if you’re a DIY queen, get onto that — but they will still cost a pretty penny. Keep putting those dollars aside for the big day and the honeymoon; your future self will thank you. 

#7. Some wedding plans take forever

Waiting for booking emails to come back. Waiting for the caterer to confirm this one detail that you need to organise something else. Waiting for your dress to arrive so you can get those alterations sorted. Sometimes, wedding planning feels like it is just one long waiting game. Patience is a virtue, and you will become a saint very soon.

#8. But some things happen VERY fast

Because it’s March, and you’re getting married in December, and hang on, yesterday it was January, and where did those two months go? And how did the to-do list get even longer?!

#9. You are going to get overwhelmed

You are planning a massive event! Unless you do this for a living, it will be big and well out of your comfort zone. Everyone will have an opinion, and you’ll go crazy trying to please everyone. So, give yourself some grace when it gets overwhelming. Sometimes you might even wonder why you’re doing it. This is normal, expected, and so okay, as my married friends have all reassured me. Talk it over with your partner and remind yourself that you’re doing just fine.

#10. At the end of the day, it really is just about you two

Sure, all the magazines and happily-marrieds say this, but I want to emphasise it: you two are the only two who matter. Read the advice from all our QB real brides, and you’ll see that this is the big takeaway from the day. So, well before the big day, being together and nourishing your relationship is super important. Make decisions together, create a day that brings you joy and lays the foundations for a long and happy life together. It’ll make engaged life that much sweeter.